Look at me and my hot mess of a life

Its gotten to the point that I don’t feel like I can be truthful when telling stories about my day to day life right now.  The reason for that is obvious when you give it more then two seconds thought.  If you are sort of slow on the uptake let me explain it to you.  Actually, screw that.  Think about it.  Figure it out.

Wow great start to this post huh?  Its 7:39 p.m. on Saturday night.  I’ve been sitting at the computer since I woke up in stupor on the carpet in my room/studio a few hours ago.  My hair was all George Washingtoned out and I didn’t have a clue what I had been doing to find myself on the carpet like that.  It was a crazy fucking day yesterday.  Actually the past two days have been really nuts.  I would like to tell the whole tale because I know its pretty fascinating to me and should be of at least some interest to you people out there as well.

I’m thinking I might just have to change some things around in my life.  You might think this sounds really stupid but if I feel like I can’t tell the stories of my life truthfully, then my life must be fucked up.  To be more specific, if the things that I’m doing on a day to day basis are things that I have to hide, then either I need to change those things or get rid of the people that I am hiding those things from.  If getting rid of somebody is not an option, then that only leaves curtailing the things that I feel that I need to hide.

For the most part, getting rid of somebody is not an option for me.  We’re talking about family members or lifelong friends and shit  and I can’t just cut them out of my life.  I’m certainly not going to be killing anybody just so I can feel like its okay to tell the stories I want to tell without fear of backlash.  On a side note though, I have come to realize that there are certain sick and twisted fucks that do things exactly like this.  I was actually just looking back on google.com to find out the name of that dude that was a 33 year old weed grower in Sacramento who killed his 23 year old wife for threatening to expose his grow room operation and then cut her up and put her in the ocean somewhere in San Francisco. I didn’t get too far on my search though because I got caught up reading about the Lupoe Family Massacre in Wilmington.

This fucking idiot Ervin Lupoe and his wife (allegedly) killer their two sets of twins (5 and 2 year olds) and 8 year old daughter, then Ervin killed his wife, then faxed a letter to some news station and then killed himself.  This all went down in Wilmington, California, near Long Beach I guess.  The decision to end 7 lives apparently was made because his wife and himself had recently been fired from Kaiser Permanente for some kind of misconduct or something.  I am glossing over the details of what the specific story is in regards to  Kaiser and them losing their jobs for a reason.

No matter what the true story is about their fucking jobs all I can say is that this dude is a fucking coward piece of shit.




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