What does it say about our nation when 59 of the 94 hits I have gotten on my blog today are from people doing searches on google? Before you answer consider that 90% of the searches had some variant of the word “ass” in them. Ha Ha Ha! I don’t even remember which post I did that included all this ass people are searching for. I have posted one hot pic of these Catholic School chicks just looking so fuckable its insane here let me show you that one again.
Come on Can you Really DENY the essential horniness in this picture? I’m not asking the eunuchs in the house. Actually are there any eunuchs that read my this blog? Doubtful. Do you even know what a eunuch is? According to the online dictionary Merriam Webster:
noun \ˈyü-nək, -nik\
Definition of EUNUCH
1: a castrated man placed in charge of a harem or employed as a chamberlain in a palace
2: a man or boy deprived of the testes or external genitals
3: one that lacks virility or power <political eunuchs>
Middle English eunuk, from Latin eunuchus, from Greek eunouchos, from eunē bed + echein to have, have charge of — more at scheme
First Known Use: 15th century
Here’s a sample test to see if you “might” have eunuch tendencies. Do any of the pictures on this blog post make you feel like shedding your clothes and doing crazy things with appropriately aged, consenting females? If you answered no then you have definitely better get yourself checked for Eunuch Disease.
Anyways, so yeah I’m not really talking to the eunuchs in the house because I don’t want to skew my results but for everybody else even girls isn’t there just a raw sexuality to that picture? Fucking Hot is what I say! Getting off the path of righteousness here but its hard to concentrate with that ass staring at me and taunting me hahahaha. This is how shallow I am. I wanna marry the girl with that blonde ass. You heard me. Sight unseen, can’t even pretend to know what her face is like but just the ass alone is enough to make me want to leave my entire fortune to her. That’s so fucked up.
How would I go about finding her? And if I did somehow find her what would I say by way of introducing myself? “Umm…hi, ever since I saw that picture of you doing dirty things with your school girl uniform on, I’ve really wanted to get to know you better?” She’d be like, “okaaaaaaay stalker”, as she pulls out her pepper spray…
I had these good intentions to write a good little farcical tale on how depraved the people who find my blog through google searches about ass are and look what has happened! I’ve sunk down to their levels. I’m one of them. I can’t deny it. I’ve probably searched for gnarlier shit then the people who end up here anyways. Nothing comes to mind really but I can remember more then one time, trying to type one handed looking for some good old internet porn. One handed as in with the left hand because the right hand was all greased up lol hahahahaha. Too much information Mr Mandich. nobody wants to hear about your sick self love episodes! (that’s what i have to keep telling myself).
My favorite kind of writing is this sing song nonsense, the computerized version of talking because you like the sound of your own voice. I’ve had a lot of hits on my blog lately. Enough for me to start thinking that maybe I’m something special (should have known better). Here is the exact numbers from the six days prior to today: 140, 108, 133, 117, 147, 124 and last time I looked maybe an hour ago I had 94 for the day already. I just looked now and I have 97 for the day. Last night on Excel, I quickly extrapolated those numbers and figured out that I’m averaging 900 views per week, 4000 per month, 48,000 per year. So I started to get a little bit of a big head like I said.
But I dug into the numbers a bit and that’s when I noticed that the only thing carrying my pathetic blogs numbers are the different variations of “ass” searches on google. Sad but true. I guess I need to really work on the quality of my content in order to gain more readers.
That’s all, and have a happy Sunday my friends. (All seven of you!!!)