Man, GetYour Dog’s Ass Out Of That Other Dog’s Nose


Sitting here with Johnny Anonymous my longtime friend from Crown Town, taking in the sights and sounds of picturesque Temecula, California on a Thursday night in February of 2016.  I went running this morning after staying up all night long working on my painting, setting up sexual rendezvous via craigslist.com, working on some photoshop shit, and thinking about life I guess.  All night long I meant to go running and all night long I found myself doing one thing after another that kept me from walking out the door of my room at the Best Western and into the mean streets.  I really did mean to go in the middle of the night too because I love running at night especially down Winchester to where it dead ends in the wilderness.  I have a sharp knife that I wear around my neck in case I come across a wild wolf, a pack of coyotes or some homicidal homeless cracked out motherfuckers.  The knife is called a CRKT Minimimalist  and if you are in the market for a stealth knife that can do some serious damage and will slice a dude’s arm all up if you need to defend yourself from attack, then by all means I heartily recommend investing the $39.99 plus tax and getting yourself one.   Okay, back to me, and my story about me and my running plans.  So finally at 7:30 a.m. I decided that enough time had passed  waiting for anonymous sex with anonymous strangers that never show up, going overboard with the black paint pen on my junkie angel painting and other assorted  miscellaneous wheel spinnage opportunities such as checking out worldstarhiphop’s vine comp collection so I finally slipped on my black nike running shoes and my tight nike running pants  got my headphones on tuned my youtube music into a little Selena Gomez that wunderkind goddess, pulled up the runtastic app on my samsung cell phone pushed play, started activity and ran straight from  my room turned right on Jefferson and headed into my personal record book.  That’s right I said record book.  I ran exactly five miles in 40: 50 which may not sound like much to you but it is out of this world to me.  That’s a pace of 8:10 per mile for five fucking miles straight.  I can tell you right now that I have never run that fast of a time for five miles in my life.  Remember that I just started running October 6th.  I just took a look at the times I was doing for five mile runs back then and they are a joke.  I’m talking about 12:00 + miles pretty much.  That’s an hour for five miles.  Since then in a little over four months I have managed to cut 4 minutes PER MILE off of my time.  I know it’s nothing that special compared to the rest of humanity but it seems really dramatic to me for some reason.

Who cares right?  I mean really…bitch

 

Nobody gives a fuck about my running time today.  That makes me a little bit sad.  I don’t think that anybody truly gives a fuck about anybody else.  You know what, inxnay that last.  That’s purely bullshit and I knew it before I wrote it.

Just had an impromptu one man concert for a one man audience, my longtime friend and occasional business comrade, Mr. Johnny Anonymous.  I was trying to cheer him up you see.  He has been down in the doldrums for quite some time now.  He is a sensitive guy and has too much heart for this cruel and twisted world that we live in.  What better music than Paranoid Android to be playing decadently in the air like small golden air nymphs fluttering in the night, swirling in and out of my brain and ears and eyes with the haunting melody sure to be the soundtrack of eternity and

wow….

I just got off on a tangent in my head the past hour while I typed not even one word.  Some hip hop band is staying in the room next to me here at the Best Western and I have been playing songs in my room that I think I sound good singing in the hopes that they might need my services as a back ground singer or the one who does the hook or something whatever.  A fluffer even….hahahah nah not that.  These dudes are black and big and I’m not about to be the fluffer but anyways right now I am listening to C-Bank “One More Shot” which was one of my favorite songs back in the good old days 30 years ago. That’s the last song in the series I just got down with even after Johnny left.  Lyrics Born doing Callin’ Out and I copied the lyrics to a word document so I could sing every word.  It sounded cool as fuck.  Also did “Some LA Niggaz” the bad ass jam by Dr. Dre Xzibit and others.  So fucking sick.  Also Common “The Light” just got played again.  I still love that song even though I don’t know a girl it could ever apply to because romance is dead in my life. Queen I ain’t seen you in a minute…..more like Queen I ain’t ever seen you in my life….I would rather get the aggression out by screaming every word of Hit Em Up by Tupak.  I love that song too just because of the huge diss factor and its so brave it seems and prophetic as all hell.

Y’all niggaz ain’t even on my level….

Laughing.  Kidding.  Don’t get all sad.

I’ve been sitting here waiting for this drama queen who wants to confront me in person about calling her dumb ass out on my blog but she is fucking lagging so hard that I am getting impatient.

First off, fuck your bitch and the click you claim
Westside when we ride come equipped with game
You claim to be a player but I fucked your wife
We bust on Bad Boy niggaz fucked for life

What a luxurious ride this life really is for me.  I must admit that any time I want to bitch about my life that I deserve to be bitch slapped because I am really lucky to be able to enjoy as much of my existence that I actually do.  I haven’t had a job in a long fucking time.  Not that I don’t want one but it just seems like so much of an ordeal to go through that for now I just can’t seem to see the forest through the trees, the light at the end off the tunnel etc etc.

Anybody that tuned into this post to actually read something interesting is going to be pretty disappointed I suppose.  I wish I could tell you guys some stories of what has been going on in my life but I feel like I would be incriminating somebody in something so I am going to err on the side of caution and just shut the fuck up.

2 thoughts on “Man, GetYour Dog’s Ass Out Of That Other Dog’s Nose

  1. Shit it is my use to be friend Interesting if it was true but lies on top of lies and making yourself sound like some god -player. Well whatever works to get chicks and money I guess but maybe consistency and honesty might work too to get the chicks you deserve that have your similar interests . You should go run in the wilderness far away and camp out and build a fire and eat outside and fish. Wait you did that in the summer remember.Sounds to me your out of your element where u are at the hotel you sound like a mountain man that lost his way with your neck weapon. Stupid did you drink the yellow punch because you are septic need a lobatomy stat! Hope u have insurance Obama care preferably and get an anesthesiologist with unsteady hands. Wait I can put in the spinal injections that would really make my day!

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