First you take deviant teenagers with hormonal imbalances and an inflated sense of self importance that borders on narcissism.
Toss in their desperate need to seek out attention whether it be positive or negative, a warped sense of unjustified entitlement in a world that refuses to go along for the ride.
Mix with a pathetic built in excuse from their upbringing (sexual abuse, bullying, lack of affection, poverty…whatever).
Sprinkle example (Columbine) after example (Virginia Tech) after example (University of Texas) after example (Westside Middle School) of those that have paved the deranged way for these impulsive little sociopaths.
The little bastards probably beat off to pictures of Dylan Klebold dressed in black with a pool of blood surrounding his ugly head while Pearl Jam’s “Jeremy” plays over and over ad infinitum.
The focus of the media and all of her sycophantic followers (of which group I freely admit belonging to) is on the sensational and shocking thrill killing of the day week month etc. The antihero perpetrators of these terrible deeds are made immediately infamous.
Remember that need for attention I pointed out above? Infamy is attention. There is a gratifying payoff in the form of the surrounding hoopla and intense, (albeit temporary) microscopic scrutiny to which we subject these doomed children of a lost generation to after they commit these senseless crimes, and it is apparently a sufficient trade off for their lives.
The bright light is focused on these losers in an effort to answer the unanswerable question (WHAT COULD WE HAVE DONE TO PREVENT THIS?)
Sad that in this day and age, 15 minutes of infamy is more then enough to provide these former nobodies all the evidence they need to believe that they have made their mark and will go down in history.
Apparently no one these days sees the forest through the trees. The outlook for mankind as a whole is not the brightest in my opinion.
Is anyone else sick to death of this shit? There is no end in sight. Its really all a bit of a self fulfilling prophecy if you ask me. Kind of a psycho salad.
That title is surely an attention getter if ever I did see one. By the way for the last week or so ever since I decided that I am from North Carolina you would do much better as far as understanding my nonsense if you read it in your mind as if you was also from North Carolina or any other state that refers to shopping carts as buggies. Just read it with a twang and we’re gonna get along just fine okay.
I ain’t really got much time for a post here right now being the urban jet setting pretty boy that I am but I feel its necessary to touch base with my constituents from time to time as a way of getting down into the trenches with y’all common folk. Y’uns is spectacular prized pupils of mine. The lesson that I am trying to teach has not been revealed to me as of yet but I’m sure it will be in time for all of us to get the necessary wisdom from that there lesson.
Actually this is a garbled attempt at sounding somehow outlandish when really and truly I am in a rush. I need to go meet up with my sister Theresa who has my driver’s license by 5pm at her place of gainful employment, I forgot the name of it but its over there up yonder somewhere in the vicinity of Lincoln Avenue and the 91 Freeway. She done told me that it was on the other side of McDonald’s which must be a blessing for anyone to be so honored to work nearby such a beautiful and wonderful company outlet as a franchisee of McDonald’s. I would love to work nearby McDonald’s and have the wonderful sensation of gaining a pound of rancid beef fat added to my svelte waistline each and everyday. After all, its a very family friendly and budget conscious place to eat. You know as well that McDonald’s corporate headquarters has made it their mission in 2011 for all of its many franchises to express individuality and originality with their menu options.
For instance in Fontana, California, the McDonald’s franchisee up there has renamed his restaurant McTucky’s after their adopted home state of Kentucky. They offer such delectable delights as the McSwamp Chicken Tenderloin sandwich in honor of the great state of Alabama (Roll Tide!!). Does anyone know what a swamp chicken is by the way? I coined the phrase myself of course one day last week in a state of extreme delirium when I was visited by an apparition of a redneck militia soldier who rolled up on me in his buggy while I was playing Cleopatra Keno over at Pechanga Casino.
I had been at the same machine for 16 days you see, and I felt like I needed dialysis treatment because my kidneys had been assaulted by nothing but Pepsis as way of nutrition the entire marathon session. When you are sitting at a slot machine which you don’t want to give up because its already taken your firstborn child, your left testicle, 75% of your remaining life force and of course the contents of your wallet, all available credit cards and a good deal of your dignity (due to having been forced to prostitute yourself in the high limits bathrooms to creepy Asian matrons with breath that smells like Pork Kung Pao dipped in Ponzu Sauce and served with fresh garlic) it gets kinda hard to remember the basic fundamentals of healthy human living like eating food, taking showers and brushing your teeth (also known as gumming your hushpuppies, if you are from Missouri, the Buggy State).
It never fails you see, when you have thrown the equivalent of a brand new Chevrolet Suburban into a computerized personal one armed robbery facilitator, or “slot machine”, and you get up out of frustration to maybe clear your head, brush your nasty ass teeth and have a smoke while maybe even taking a look at the sun for the first time in forever, that some old ass asian water buffalo will saunter up and immediately hit the progressive jackpot on your untended machine. If you have ever gone through such a miserable and incomprehensibly demoralizing (sound familiar 12 steppers?) nightmare as I have many times you know what I’m talking about. Its painful hombre. Very very painful.
In an effort to ensure that such a horrible outcome does not repeat itself, most compulsively degenerate morons who gamble, such as myself, have taken certain steps, which when used in conjunction with a lobotomy, have been shown to be of assistance in dealing with this issue. One of these steps is known as Transcendental Medication and is a method similar to the “meditation” practiced by Buddhists and New Age Flower Children for years now. Many of the processes involved with TM as I’ll call it are the same only different as its older, better, less stupid brother, Meditation. Both involve wiping the psyche clear of mental debris that maybe inhibiting the swamp also known as your mind and preventing it from processing life through a more realistic and less expensive filter then the constantly failing “Angry and Disgruntled Degenerate Slot Player” most of the people that benefit from TM have historically chosen.
You are probably asking yourself what any of this slick jargon has to do with the topic you are here to learn more about. That topic of course is the history of the Swamp Chicken which no doubt has left you in a state of nervous anticipation, bordering on frenzied manic hysteria while you have been nervously counting down the hours until which time I deemed appropriate to share with you, gentle reader. To be honest, I’m somewhat lost myself on what TM has to do with a swamp chicken. The thing is, I figure it would be a waste to waste (is that even proper grammar?) my elegantly crafted lines of pure horse manure that I’ve typed so far so (again….proper grammar?) I’m just going to have to continue bluffing at the connection between the two totally unrelated and actually non exsitent subjects.
I figure its easier to just continue double barreling y’all with blasts of bullshit that have no roots in reality rather then suck it up, admit to God, myself and all of the other human beings the exact nature of my “lack of anything meaningful to share” and start over or perhaps even scrap the whole ridiculous idea of writing a post today. Hopefully, I can continue to baffle and amaze both of us with this boisterous, bat shit bending banter and somehow pull it all together at the end with some sort of fairy tale like save while managing to sound humble, enthusiastic and pleasantly self effacing at the same time as appearing to be competent and genuine.
I am thinking that maybe this is a bit much to have on my plate today but you know what “they” say…(throw in some tired cliche about never losing sight of your dreams) and a blah blah blah blah blah blah and a yaddha yaddha yaddha.
Oh yeah, ghetto dwelling and the Norco Crips too okay? Assa lamma lenkum my brothers and sisters and God bless us each and everyone. Take care folks, talk to y’uns later.
This is Anthony Mandich, your humble and nutritious servant saying, So Long!
P.S. “Hottest Ass”
P.P.S. “Sex, drugs, and Pussy”!
P.P.S.S. “Sean Stenlake”, Sean Stenlake: Attorney at Law, Sean Stenlake: American Hero, Sean Stenlake: The Brother I Never Knew, Sean Stenlake: Lessons in Being Great, Sean Stenlake I Love You, Sean Stenlake: Blue Eyed Wunderkind, Sean Stenlake: Everything You Have Always Wanted to Know But Were Afraid to Assk
one last thing, i’m going to experiment to see how many hits i get from putting these tags in this post okay? sean stenlake, sean stenlake attorney, anthony mandich idiot savant, what a stupid blog, god i’m dumb, ass, hottest ass, hottest fucking ass meets hotter fucking ass, asses that are hot, hotties without ass, ass loving hoes, what an ass, asshole, ass ass ass nothing but just pure ass, got ass?, want ass?, smell my ass, you are an ass, assume nothing, makes an ass out of you and me, get it ass?, ha ha ha ass sss you eaten dinner yet, ass is assembled, big huge ass in my ass, tickle my ass, put your cigar out on my ass, man do i love talking about ass, ass is so cool man, its all about the ass, get it, ass???, who wants to over use the word ass?, jackass, horse’s ass, jackasses with ass eating tendencies, horse’s ass is a big ass and they fuck that ass, horny mexican mamas with hottest ass, korean ass, chinese ass, japanese ass, white trash ass bandit, booty smelling ass pigs, ass in zen, common characteristics of an ass, wikipedia entry for ass, history of anthony mandich’s ass, poop comes out of a butt but you sir are an ass, Wiki ass, wiki mandich asshole, fucking ass lover, grape nuts drive me nuts ass boy, why do you love the mans ass so god damn much, damn what an ass, enough already with the ass ass, ass ass boy, ass ass toy, jump on that ass, fist that ass, tongue dart the dark star, jason rhodes is an ass, me and my ass, growing up with my ass, hairy ass, smelly ass, fat as a rhino’s ass, big ass white bitches, trailer park ass, old ass, legal young ass, don’t be such an ass, monetizing your blog through the use of the word ass, google searches with ass, attention getting titles, attention getting ass, assghanistan, north carolina living, i come from a buggy, get in my buggy, mantra, meditation, buddhism, transcendental medication, professing to be wise, they became fools, facing the nation, 12 steps, incomprehensible demoralization, self effacing twits, mocking the readers, the moons over my hammy, ethan hawke, boys love boys ass that are over 18 of course. smash that ass with your tongue, faux outlandish, cliche driven mockery, waste of time topics, dude i want to kill you for wasting my time, becoming a slog even if you are human, human seo, human slog, slog, search engine optimization for dummies, copyrights for dummies, dummies for dummies, buggies for dummies, stupid is forrest gumpisms for dummies, i’m a big old dummy, i fuck chicks, i fuck chicks alot, chcks love to suck my ass
I came across this letter on the internet in May of 2010. At that time I felt an incredible affinity with the guy who wrote the letter to his wife. I wish I could remember exactly where I found it. It could have easily been written by me. I’m not saying that in order to influence your opinion on this topic. In fact , I am just curious what others think about the issue of drugs and society. It’s definitely a complex and polarizing issue for most. Surprisingly, I suppose, my experiences on all sides of this topic have given me a flexible open minded approach in a sense. I have a hard time saying yes or no, black or white, right or wrong. Drugs….many shades of grey. That’s my best answer. A copout? 100% LOL but…I just don’t think you can deny that its impossible to sum up this issue in a sentence, a paragraph, or even several pages. What do you think?
it’s easy to write me off as drug addled and to send me your dramatic texts about not sleeping for a week because you are so worried about me. and fair enough, i suppose i deserve that but regardless, i am not the same person. i am different. and different for the better by far. i’m on the road to a better place 100% for sure.
an open mind, a friendly attitude, the knowledge that i can persevere under impossible circumstances, somehow hold on, and in the end come out alive and fully intact mentally and physically….these are nothing but states of mind. but thoughts control your world. period. yes i think i am different then everyone else and yes i think i am special and that i am destined to make a direct, positive impact on the world by doing something amazing and unique to me. sounds stupid. whatever. i realize fully that every single person in n.a. and a.a. would scoff 100% at that statement. in fact, my guess is that the more militant n.a. nazi types would be using profanity laced, high decibel, somewhat frenzied speech to make it clear just how pathetic, self-deluded, idiotic, and dishonest i am to even have the nerve to pretend to be different in any way.
narcissistic maybe. different? never.
and they will eat this next sentence up like a wino eats trash.
ha ha ha. i can hear the “oh my fucking god”s and “this pathetic prick”s and the “who does this fucking creep think he is charlotte?”s now. i’ve read material on quite a few crystal meth abuse oriented websites and it’s like a pattern. on the blog portion where people write in to share their experience, strength and hope in the form of letters, it never fails. as soon as a person writes in and freely admits to still using meth and tries to say anything whatsoever other then “i am a hopeless, hell bound addict, please help me before i destroy everything i come in contact with”, the bloodthirsty, incredibly hypocritical, judgmental, bible & big book thumping, cliché laden zealots jump all over him/her like a pack of wolves.
it’s terrifying actually. lol. i remember this one letter this guy wrote and he admitted using meth almost daily for two years. he wrote an incredible, cogent and well reasoned thesis basically, on his experience with crystal. to be fair, he definitely did not advocate drug use, admitted freely that it ruins many lives and in general did not write even one sentence that could have been perceived as inflammatory, boastful, or slightly mocking the community he was addressing; namely recovering addicts and maybe the codependent types from their immediate family/friends.
now charlotte, you know i am a decent writer and i’m telling you like it is. it was a good, solid 2-3 page document, written with a humble approach. he simply explained his personal views and his actual journey. this guy got massacred. he was ridiculed to the point that it was stupid. they just refused to read anything he had written once they saw the part about still using. once that was out there, nothing, and i mean absolutely nothing he had to say had any credibility in the judgmental eyes of the people who responded to him with hatred and scorn.
it turned me off to the idea of organized treatment in a similar way that i am turned off by the idea of organized religion. any approach that has “one size fits ALL” and refuses to give credence to individuality makes me want to vomit. i have no idea why but this bible verse from the book of romans “professing to be wise they became fools” comes to mind.. but of course you know me and i’m a bit of a scoffer in general. so when i saw the way that they picked this guy apart, i was over it before i even finished reading the first barb filled response.
the guy was basically asking for advice and said that he gets benefits from using and that thus far in his life, the benefits (delusional or not) that he still receives, compensate for, and, in fact, still overshadow whatever negative consequences he has had to face. and like i said, i read his letter in detail a couple times, and what he was saying, i could totally see as being truthful and realistic. he actually asked what the others thought, if they could give him some direction, asked if he needs to quit or at least slow his roll, asked if he was an addict (he didn’t believe that he was—fully, anyhow) etc. basically a guy wanting to tell his side of the story. clearly he wasn’t at the point where he could totally relate with addicts who had hit the bottom and were totally fucking out of control.
he wasn’t out robbing, cheating and manipulating everyone and everything to stay high. that’s not to say he wouldn’t end up there nor was he claiming a miracle approach to using that allowed him to be different then everyone else, special or unique. he made sense though, you know what i mean? that’s what really got them all so fucking pissed because he did give some guidelines that he used for staying one step ahead of the drug overtaking his life. things like drinking water, not using everyday, going to sleep everyday, staying in his social scene, family scene, being employed, exercising, having varied interests and activities, eating plenty of healthy food, taking care of his teeth and hygiene, stuff like that. and he was asking for some more similar guidelines and just the point of view of some people who knew better etc. well, his point of view did not sit well with anybody. they tore him a new asshole and quickly dismissed him as an untrustworthy, pathological liar, and a deluded addict who was out of step with reality and doomed. not one positive word, no encouragement, no welcoming explanations on why his approach, though sincere, was still misguided….nothing. the guy probably went out and hung himself after reading the barrage of personal attack laden hate mail that he received in the way of responses.
this from a bunch of addicts who obviously had forgotten what its like to be one themselves. he admitted he was still using you see and he gave common sense principles that worked to delay him reaching that level of hopeless addict and he was ridiculed hugely for doing that.? speaking for myself i was pissed off because of how damaging i think their attitudes would be to someone who was wavering. not that i was wavering ha ha ha fuck that shit but IF i would have been and i saw that i wouldn’t be wavering EVER and i know a lot of kids feel the same way. its like if you don’t conform to their dogma that your life is so hopeless and unmanageable that you can’t live without “keep coming back it works if you work it” then you should be cast out and ridiculed. a big reason people use drugs in the first place is that whole rebellious, anti authority thing, not wanting to be a square and all that. reacting like the guy was satan made me feel even more rebellious. i was like “if this is what you get when you get clean then i wanna stay dirty baby”.
exclusion because you are different………. how is that approach pragmatic? the only reason they attacked is because of the fatal mistake the guy made when writing his letter. he gave an ALTERNATIVE option that didn’t revolve around the principles of narcotics anonymous and EVEN worse didn’t force a person to abstain completely if they chose not to. and that’s what i hate about twelve step programs in general. again, you know me, and the whole “it’s my way or the highway” doesn’t sit well with me and in fact makes me do the opposite most of the time. i’m not the only one. believe me i know that they reacted so strongly because they didn’t want anyone who had already decided that their shitty lives had become unmanageable to change that decision because of this dude’s words and come to the conclusion that maybe they could possibly go back to using and control it. delusional thinking for sure and not a good idea by any means. however, the bully tactics employed by those who responded to this guy did way more harm then good. you could tell they felt super threatened by this seemingly harmless guy and his calm and reasonable approach to the situation.
i truly hope you never take the zealots approach to your treatment and recovery. far better to be flexible in every area of your life and use the knowledge you have gained in rehab and in meetings etc to form a living, breathing, powerful, and INCLUSIVE set of guidelines for sustained recovery from addiction. to give you a perfect example i’ll just say this, the responses i read all reminded me of my hypocritical brother, a guy who gets fucking wasted, pisses on peoples couches, does shit loads of cocaine and then deigns to give me advice on me and my fucked up life to a point where you just want to vomit at the hypocrisy. enough said.
hysteria in any form either from an addict or the cured set, is ugly and scary. please don’t harden yourself ever, to the realities faced by people who are out in the world with nobody to share their lives with, unhappily existing in a vacuum without an iota of faith that their life has a chance of becoming fulfilled and happy. sure that fucking marine drill sergeant approach may bring some hardcore addicts in for treatment. long term though, intolerant ranting type name calling and angry tirades will push away the people who really probably have the best chances of success. i’m referring to people who are considered as “functioning addicts”. lol, i’m too much of a coward to send my letter into the website so i am addressing my complaints with your community in a more personal way, one on one with my ex wife lol..you should make it your mission to come up with some groundbreaking way of solving my issues. that would be awesome and it would help a lot of people because i’m positive that many people out in the world would agree with my point of view number one and number two belong to that “functioning addict” group, and still possess enough individuality and strength to veto any treatment option that is going to talk down to or ridicule them.
only fucked up, rogue, third world piece of shit, hellhole countries with despotic tyrannic leaders rule their people by eliminating the brave souls who dare to voice a contrary opinion. ever hear of the khmer rouge? google it. charlotte you need to bring n.a. out of the dark ages, they are using methods of governing their people that are also used in iran, china, north korea, haiti, africa, i think you are amazing enough to actually pull n.a. out of the twentieth century and into the modern world. anyway i remain yours,
What should I talk about today hmmm? All sorts of shit perhaps? Okay, well I feel like a pretty big star right now because Antonio Sabato Jr., that hunk of a man posted a little thank you blurb on my Facebook wall a little bit ago. What a nightmare for that poor guy really. I mean how does one deal with one supercreepy yet oddly popular little fella like me? I am doing an unauthorized and definitely unsolicited yet supremely fucking cool painting of his girlfriend cheryl and i posted a copy of it on his wall so he came on my wall and said thanks. I mean he doesn’t want to appear ungrateful to his fans and shit so that’s understandable but still though, how many sicko fans does the dude probably have? I can only imagine how many dumpy dowdy mid western fatty housewives from Kansas or Kentucky or Nebraska or some shit are members of his fan club. My God, the thought horrifies me for him. All these wanna be sexy, wanna be cougars (without the cash, class and with triple the ass) who fell in love with Antonio when was on General Hospital way back when….wow. I’m sure tons of them have painted portraits of him or baked him cookies or sent him their size 124 extra stout soiled panties in the mail, total delusions of grandeur running through their fat little heads that Antonio really wants any of this shit. That Antonio wants anything more then to be left alone lol. But still, he is a very successful public figure with a cultivate heartthrob image and has probably always felt obligated to personally thank everyone for whatever little gifts they send, no matter how fucking insane they might actually be. And he’s actually totally fucking cool. I mean I know plenty of my own REAL FLesH AND bLOOD FRIENDS, who feel it well within their rights to delete my posts or censor me or whatever. To his credit, everything I have ever posted on his wall, is still there. So I respect him for reals and I feel sorry for him too. So I try not to be too much of a creep with my celebrity friends and anyways fucking hell the painting is sick as fuck. Its rad. So maybe I’m a delusional midwestern cougar fatty myself and if I do send him the painting someday, it will probably end up God knows where but doubt if its gonna be hanging over the dining room table lol. Well thats my first topic at a close. Bottom line, don’t be hard on Antonio Sabato Jr. , as he is a cool mother fucker, a handsome mother fucker, with a hotter then goddamn hell girlfriend, and he’s not a dick. Alrighty moving right along….
Wow I could go in so many directions right now. Should I talk about this chick Kendra that I made out with for brief interlude on Saturday night in Los Angeles, should I talk about Steve Jacobson and how good he has it with his sexy ass girlfriend who is down to be his sex slave basically, should I talk about Ryan Johnson, that suave debonair friend of mine, with a face whose cheeks you just wanna squeeze he’s that handsome of a specimen? Should I talk about my last sexual encounter(s) with _ _ _ _ _ _ or _ _ _ _ _ or _ _ _ _ _ _? Should I talk about the many beautiful young ladies I fell in love with at the Apoolcalypse party on Saturday August 21st, 2010 at Dystopian Studios? There were many new faces such as Toni, H (8th Letter)-WOW!, Sasha, Kim. There were many faces I’ve seen before but only strengthened my love for like Eunice, Eden, and Heather. There was one notable face missing, that I’m pining over, Erica. So yeah we could go there and stay there for a couple of blogs.
I could talk about the termination of all contact forever with my ex wife Briar. There are plenty of untold scandalous details to unfold for you captive readers. Since she can now officially “suck it” she is fair game so perhaps that’s a topic?
We could get into some really taboo stuff like my dealing with Rodney who none of you are familiar with at the moment but you would be fascinated with learning about.
Gambling is a topic I am aching to get into with you all. I have a horror story hand to tell you about but I’m still sickened by it myself so I don’t actually know if i I wanna go there right now.
We could even gloss over a few little sentences about my buddy Sean Stenlake’s sexier then goddamn hell little princess of a girlfriend Natasha who is a real life Playboy Playmate who Sean is privileged enough to ravage on a daily basis about forty feet from where I know find myself perched.
LA in general is not a bad topic and i have lots to go over on that end as well. We could get into a little Area 33 discussion, we could talk about Jacen Onda and his antics. I could finish by previously started series about my ex girlfriend “Polly” or was it “Dolly” who is now safely back in her husbands house in “Texas”.
My fat dog Woodie getting owned, punked and probably butt fucked by Snickers on a nightly basis, is a topic I have alot of enthusiasm to discuss. My brother Jon, wow, I would love to do a special series just on Jon alone. He’s a special and unique young creature of the night and we could spend many an hour together about him.
I’ve got an MMA fighter friend named Ian McCall who I plan to get up to some mischief with really soon. We could talk about him and his competitive sexual nature. He’s definitely a kindred spirit although I’m not too sure he would be really that proud of such a horrible fact.
Casino Junkie Crew is one topic I plan on spending several hours regaling you with tales about. Probably I will end up writing a book about topic alone if live long enough.
Codependent’s reunion show, Jim Kennedy’s birthday bash, Ricky Menace’s return to the stage….all on three consecutive days starting this Friday…we will get into all the gory details of that weekend but lets wait until that weekend happens.
What else? The Christian Facebook Army, Caffeine Magazine and my exclusion therefrom, JoJo Meadows art promotion efforts on my behalf in the UK, the state of the union of my art career and life in general, the chaos that is my room. All of these are worthy topics and I want to get to all of them. As you can see we have lots to discuss and I think I’m gonna leave everybody with that for now as I have a poker tournament to play on Full Tilt at the moment, as well as a painting I am working on.
Bye Everybody. I miss you Michelle and Kellie the Bear Woman
These are some of my Favorite Quotes. Notice that they are all MY quotes. That speaks volumes in and of itself right there. Wow, I am really self absorbed in a cuddly sorta way.
“To be completely honest,……”
2. “Shut the fuck up man, Jesus, I’m so sick of listening to your babble.”
3. “Whatever dog lips.”
4. “They can fuck off”
5. “Yeah but who’s bad ass.”
…6. “Really, you think you can beat me heads up?”
8. “I know I’m a bad kid but I’m trying to behave.”
9. “Who wants to suck me?”
10. “I’m all in.”
11. “Send it jackass. How did that feel?”
13. “Why are you even with that BITCH?”
14. “You are the most pussy whipped little sissy.”
15. “Hi, honey….no…..I haven’t been at the casino.”
16. “I’m not even on drugs…..”
17. “Mom do you have any money?”
18. “Chip can I borrow twenty bucks?”
19. “Heeeeeeeyyyyyy…..whats up you sexy little mama?”
20. “Fuck….you are so fucking hot!!”
21. “We should make out..immediately.”
22. “Fuck him…aren’t you sick of that idiot yet? Come over!”
24. “Stick your tongue in my MOUTH!”
25. “You have the best ass.”
26. “Those panties are making me feel funny inside.”
27. “I don’t give a shit if you just got done running.”
28. “Fuck taking a shower first bitch.”
31. “I want cuddles….”
32. “My mom already knows dude. She thinks I’m just a jackass.”
34. “Let’s go to the casino tonight.”
35. “You are the worst fucking poker player I have ever ever seen.”
36. “What a moronic call. Fucking Jackass.”
37. “Whatever dick.”
38. “I hope you die. Let’s play heads up idiot.”
44. “My ringer was off.”
45. “I left my phone in the car.”
46. “I was in a business meeting had to turn it off.”
47. “I was on the other line long distance.”
48. “I didn’t get no voice mails.”
49. “I don’t have any missed calls.”
50. “You didn’t text me.”
51. “Whatever…fuck you.”
52. “No….you fuck off jackass.”
53. “You better have my cash fucker.”
54. “Hell no I don’t wanna play for I.O.U’s. Fuck that.”
55. “Dude I like chick music. Call me a fag I don’t care.”
56. “Oh, you really think your gonna get more chicks then me…”
58. “Grow some balls. I can’t believe you even give a shit about her.”
59. “You’re crying? Huh? Why would you even want to work it out with her? She’s a whore! She talks shit about you all over town. She fucked your best friend. She gave ME a blow job….just kidding man. No…dude….I’m just kidding…take it easy psycho. I wouldn’t let that skanky bitch touch my cock
60. “Doubt it.”
61. “Fuck that!”
62. “Why? Cuz I’m fucking hot that’s why. Why do you think? Just shut up!”
63. “You are so pissing me off right now.”
64. “God you are such a little baby.”
66. “Do I have to do it right this second?”
67. “I willlllllllllllll.”
68. “You’ll be sorry for that I guarantee it.”
69. “Watch and see”
72. “I don’t care about what other guys had to put up with. I’m not an “other guy”.”
88. “I didn’t make that mess.”
89. “I don’t even use the fucking microwave.”
90. “Why do I have to be held accountable for that?”
91. “Oh I am the slob is that it?”
92. “What do you mean I’m selfish?”
93. “I’m sorry okay. I will be a better kid I promise. I love you.”
95. “Who is itttttt? I’ll be right out I’m getting changed.”
96. “I’m not sleeping.”
97. “I don’t PAY for drugs. Are you crazy. People just give it to me.”
98. “It wasn’t me. I didn’t even touch your door let alone go in your room.”
99. “Do you have any money?”
100. “I’ll pay you back next week. I swear.”